The key part of my response:
The Lord created you unique, He loves you, and He wants to help you.
Turn to the Lord, just as you are, and let Him take it from there.
For details, read on...
3:1 Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman, "Has God indeed said, 'You shall not eat of every tree of the garden'?"
3:2 And the woman said to the serpent, "We may eat the fruit of the trees of the garden;
3:3 "but of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God has said, 'You shall not eat it, nor shall you touch it, lest you die.' "
3:4 Then the serpent said to the woman, "You will not surely die.
3:5 "For God knows that in the day you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."
3:6 So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate.
3:7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings.
3:8 And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden.
3:9 Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, "Where are you?"
3:10 So he said, "I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself."
(from the Book of Genesis)
This is an interesting passage. Adam does something he knows he's not supposed to do, and then God walks through the garden, so Adam hides. Then God asks "Where are you?"
Wait a minute! Don't You know? Aren't You God?
Of course He knows where Adam is. He knows where Adam is and what Adam has done. The question was not for God's sake, but for Adam's sake, so Adam would admit what he had done. Once Adam acknowledges his mistake, God begins the healing process. But, the first step is that we need to admit that we have a problem. And, if we don't know that we have a problem, or don't want to admit it, God can help us there, too.
To not admit that there is a problem is to "stick your head in the sand", or to hide behind a tree from God, like Adam did. Adam's real problem wasn't that he had sinned; his real problem was that, by hiding himself from God, by distancing himself from his Creator, he was in real danger of getting into far more serious trouble. (Keep in mind, that serpent was still out there!)
Contrast that to Zacchaeus:
19:1 Then Jesus entered and passed through Jericho.
19:2 Now behold, there was a man named Zacchaeus who was a chief tax collector, and he was rich.
19:3 And he sought to see who Jesus was, but could not because of the crowd, for he was of short stature.
19:4 So he ran ahead and climbed up into a sycamore tree to see Him, for He was going to pass that way.
19:5 And when Jesus came to the place, He looked up and saw him, and said to him, "Zacchaeus, make haste and come down, for today I must stay at your house."
19:6 So he made haste and came down, and received Him joyfully.
19:7 But when they saw it, they all complained, saying, "He has gone to be a guest with a man who is a sinner."
19:8 Then Zacchaeus stood and said to the Lord, "Look, Lord, I give half of my goods to the poor; and if I have taken anything from anyone by false accusation, I restore fourfold."
19:9 And Jesus said to him, "Today salvation has come to this house, because he also is a son of Abraham;
19:10 "for the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost."
(from the Gospel according to Luke)
Zacchaeus was a tax collector. Tax collectors in those days in that part of the world were corrupt; they were extortioners. Yet, rather than hide his sinful self behind a tree as Adam had done (and as I always want to do), Zacchaeus climbed a tree to see Jesus. Of course, Jesus already knew all about Zacchaeus, including Zacchaeus' sinful life; but, because Zacchaeus did not hide from Him, but rather made himself very visible so Jesus could enter his life, salvation came to Zacchaeus' house that day.
And in the same way, by seeking God's help, salvation has come to your house today.
God is God --
Rev 1:8 "I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End," says the Lord, "Who is and Who was and Who is to come, the Almighty."
There is nothing that He can't do!
Don't think for a moment that you have done something so bad, or that you are so far gone, or whatever, that your Creator can't save you -- after all, it was He Who created the Earth and everything on it, Who created the Heavens and everything in them, Who created the Sea and everything in it. There is nothing He can't do. The only danger is that you might try to hide yourself from Him, in which case you would be in danger, because that serpent is still out there. In admitting your problems and inviting Him into your life, you've already done the part that is hardest for you. Now He will take it from here -- just make sure that you keep inviting Him in, again and again, and thanking Him for everything.
Don't wait until you do this or achieve that -- don't put it off. Turn to Him now, just as you are. He does not call the qualified; He qualifies the called.
John 15:16 "You did not choose Me, but I chose you..."
There is nothing He can't fix, and Jesus, Who hung on that cross for you, will not abandon you now. He didn't abandon you then when He was being tortured and hung out to die, He will not abandon you now.
Just keep inviting Him in and thanking Him, and before you know it, your life will be a miracle.
